WTF Pic of the Day: Paris Hilton Partying at a Super Bowl Bash

I must say, I have to hand it to Paris Hilton. This is the classiest way to let out the vadge fart she's been holding in for the past hour since the last time she got laid - by the limo driver after he dropped her off at the party.



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Paris Hilton and Lady Gaga Join Forces

Paris Hilton and Lady Gaga make an incredible duo. Enjoy! And Lady Gaga's cd The Fame is really good. Perfection!



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Brittany Flickinger Treat Me So Bad Song

On Brittany Flickinger's new song "Treat Me So Bad," Brittany's good vocals are hidden and smothered and this track needs better production and catchy-ness, but she has the potential to actually go somewhere.

Paris Hilton's BFF show was a great launching pad for Brittany's music career and she's already on the Z-list map. If she can make decent songs, she has a chance, but songs like the one below can too easily be lost in the shuffle with all the other one-hit wonders. It sounds like a carbon copy of too many songs to mention. Also, with Paris recently ditching Britt for Aubrey O'Day, who else wants to think she wrote this about Paris?





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Paris Hilton Robbed, Jewelry Missing - Door was Left Open

An estimated $2 million worth of jewelry and other belongings was stolen from the home of Paris Hilton, according to the Los Angeles Police Department.

LAPD Officer April Harding says a security guard reported a forced entry at 5 a.m. at 3300 Clarendon in Sherman Oaks and the guard described the burglar as a man in a hooded sweatshirt and gloves.

The robbery occurred overnight at Hilton's Hollywood Hills home. The burglar or burglars got into the house through an unlocked door, according to LAPD sources, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because the investigation was ongoing.

Detectives from the LAPD's Van Nuys division were at the home this morning conducting interviews. The sources told The Times that Hilton was not home at the time of the burglary and that the house is equipped with security video equipment.

It remains unclear whether this case is connected to last year's series of serial burglaries that targeted celebrities in the Westside.

Hilton recently told Esquire magazine about her home: "The best thing I've ever bought with money is my house. Having a nightclub in your house really helps for having a party."

My original draft got deleted. I can't recreate it. :( Technology is good shiz!!!!


L.A. Times

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Onch Nude Pics, Onch Naked in Bathtub

Onch naked pictures are the most laughable Z list reality tv photos I've ever seen. He. Has. No. Penis. But he thinks he does and he thinks we want to see his pecker. He can't even peck with that thing. Forget being a BFF, good lucking finding a boyfriend.

Onch naked pictures

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Paris Hilton's BFF Brittany Isn't Very Pretty, But She's Down to Earth

Brittany was the right choice for Paris Hilton's new BFF because she's not gorgeous. Paris Hilton won't have anyone steal her thunder. Brittany looks hot and fug depending on the angle of the camera or the day, just like me. :) It's a gift.

After the finale where Paris' friends met Brittany, it just made me like Brittany even more. She's a sweet, down to earth chick anyone would love. Congrats to Paris and Brittany!

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Paris Hilton's BFF Show has Low Ratings, Paris Hilton Boo'd at Pussycat Dolls Show

The real reason Paris Hilton dumped Benji Madden is because she was never in love with him and she wanted to go out and party like she used to. While the paps still take her picture, the public doesn't care! Paris Hilton's stock has plummeted. The day we've been waiting for is here?

Paris Hilton is getting a rude awakening as her market value plummets. The public now seems to have lost interest in the emaciated, fake baby voiced skank.

The heir-head, whose show, “Paris Hilton’s My New BFF,” on MTV has low ratings, was booed so badly at the Kress in Hollywood this weekend, she refused to take the stage.

Hilton was at a birthday party for designer Christian Audigier’s daughter, Crystal, and was supposed to introduce the Pussycat Dolls. But when Audigier took the stage and yelled to the crowd, “Do you want to see Paris Hilton?” our spy said,

“The entire room - which had just cheered when they thought Britney Spears was coming - booed loudly. Paris was practically in tears and left without taking the stage.”

Tragic?

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Paris Hilton Benji Madden Breakup, Paris and Benji Split

Paris Hilton's rep has confirmed this heart wrenching news with the following statement:

"Even though they are still in love, they felt it would be better to just be friends,"

The reason for the split?

"Benji was overprotective and controlling. He doesn't get along with any of her friends. Friends thought Paris had changed since being with Benji and she wants to be herself again."

Everyone knows they split because of the pictures that surfaced on Monday of Paris hanging out with her ex, Nachos. The moment I saw those photos, I knew their relationship was over. Benji is too prideful to deal with the embarrassment of everyone telling him his girlfriend is cheating.

"Nothing went on between Paris and Stav in Miami. She was there for a girls weekend with her BFFs. Benji really respected her, they will be friends forever."

source

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Paris Hilton Repo! The Genetic Opera Pictures

Paris Hilton needs prayer. That wonk eye is breathtaking.

I wrote an entire post about how I'm enjoying Paris Hilton's BFF show because it shows us a real side of Paris, but it got deleted. Technology is no BFF.

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Benji Madden is Pussy Whip, Says He's in Love With Paris Hilton

And he wants to make her his wife.

A scientific study should be created to find out how a tall skank gets moist over a vertically challenged, chunky troll.

Benji Madden would like to set the record straight.

“Paris is the love of my life,” he tells Life & Style. “She’s the most beautiful woman in the world. These rumors are not only hurtful but completely false and absurd. She is my life and the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with.

I never give off any impression other than that I am madly in love with Paris. I am disgusted that people would make up such malicious lies. She is my life, my heart and my soul and is the most important thing in my life. No one exists but her. I am the most loyal guy in the world and would never even look at anyone else.”

And Paris?

“Benji and I have an amazing relationship and I trust him with my life. I don’t ever believe rumors regarding my love. I know he would never hurt me and he knows the same about me.”

I know from personal encounters that the Maddens are two of the nicest guys in Hollyweird, but that doesn't mean this match-up doesn't freak me the hell out!

What will their spawn look like? I really need one of those Conan O'Brien 'If They Mated' pictures. I'm thinkin' chubby, wide-faced kids with Siamese eyes, Paris' beak nose and some wonky wonk.

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Paris Hilton in London, Paris Hilton Size 12 Shoe Pics

Paris Hilton has the biggest feet I have ever seen. What's wrong with her? Paris Hilton is deformed. Her feet are not supposed to be this big.

Just take a look at those ginormous, enormous, colossal, oversized things at the bottom of her ankles that we call feet.

Prince William, Paris Hilton and Prince William Christina Aguilera at Club Together

Prince William must be unaware that he is sandwiched between various strains of unnamed STDs, horse hair wigs and excessive makeup and silicone as he gets friendly with Christina Aguilera and Paris Hilton, exchanging phone numbers with both of them.I wanna know what they're talkin' bout!!!Went down like this:

Prince William spotted Xtina, walked over to her and sat his royal arse down. The two were sitting closely, "flirting" like crazy and they exchanged digits.

Then the infested heiress came up, sitting down unannounced. At that point Prince Harry left the table. He wants to have kids someday, doesn't wanna go sterile. Paris sitting her skank ass down apparently upset Xtina but she didn't wanna go ghetto in front of rotalty. Paris and William also exchanged numbers and were friendly.

Think about it, who did Prince William approach first? The one without the diseases. Paris' wonk also influenced the prince's preference.

The wonk is scary business. You dunno whether you should look directly at it, take a quick glimpse then focus on sumthin else, twitch, tell her to fix it, or try to see if its eyelid moves at the same pace of her normal eye. It's work figuring out what to do when you're talking to someone with a fugged up eye. There's a lot that must be figured out first before any attempts should be made, proceeding only if you're exercising proper precautionary steps and have quick reflex reactions.

Christina's bat boy was also in the club. Poor thing is just like a backdrop, effing scenery when Christina wants to talk to other, more attractive people within the same venues.

source

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Paris Hilton red lipstick horror

This is the worst Paris Hilton has ever looked. Someone save her.

Paris Hilton at the Diesel xXx Creative Experiment Party in London. The result is fugness from weave to stiletto. And some fierce wonk eye.

Funnyordie.com Videos Posted Here

Funny or die makes the best videos online! Check out this latest spoof - you won't be sorry. Paris Hilton joins forces with Martin Sheen for a laugh out loud short.

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Paris Hilton Benji Madden Pics

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden at Mur.Mur Nightclub in Atlantic City

Listen to Paris Hilton's Horrible New Song, Paris Hilton "My BFF" Song

WHY God WHY?!
Paris Hilton's latest single could convert skeptics into fans.

The "Stars Are Blind" singer premiered a dance-worthy new song – "My BFF," which she co-wrote with Benji Madden – Tuesday on Ryan Seacrest's KIIS-FM radio show in Los Angeles.

In the techno-inspired theme song to Hilton’s new reality show, My New BFF, which premieres Tuesday night on MTV, Hilton sings, "Could you be the one I want? (My new best friend.) Could you be the one I need? (My new best friend.)"

In June, Hilton, 27, said of her boyfriend of seven months, "Benji and I have been working hard on [the song]."

Listen to Paris' new song - My Mac is actin' a fool and I'm at Starbucks right now (it's loud), so I haven't heard it yet. :( Is it any good?

Paris Hilton Perfume, Fairy Dust Stinks, Coming Soon

Four fragrances just isn't enough! Paris Hilton is releasing her fifth fragrance, Fairy Dust.

In the ads, the infected heiress dresses up like a low rent skank version of Tinkerbell. Her top does not match her blue skirt or wings, her belly button looks penciled in and that ish on her legs looks like a cartoon doodle. Her neck appears to be thicker than her thighs and her head looks ready to snap off. I wouldn't mind.

Anyone want some Photoshop work done? Hire junior high kids, they'll do a much more thorough job.

Paris' skank juice hits stores mid-October.

Paris Hilton Reveals Business Plans, Aspirations for 20 Years From Now

Bow down, bitches! The heiress is actually brilliant. Her baby voice and dumb-blonde image is only a gimmick. It works flawlessly, but you can't be successful if you're mentally challenged, and this woman is one of the most ambitious celebrities around.

She's got fame and business all figured out. I am so impressed right now. What going on with me? First I cried over Jessica Simpson, now I'm into Paris for a moment? I may be losing my ability to be a gossip blogger. Hating is mandatory.

Paris says she works hard, plans out her dreams and knows where she's headed. That's more than many people without any money can say, let alone an heiress. Luvs it! :) Paris talked to Reuters about the misconception that she doesn't work.

"I am literally running a huge corporation. I have my clothing lines, my champagne, my watches, shoes and purses and dog clothes -- every sort of product you can imagine. I am doing movies. I am doing my record right now, producing, starring in a TV show. So it is a 24 hour, seven day-a-week job. I work all the time, so I laugh when I hear people say that."

To get through her day, she says the first thing she does in the morning is "think about what I dreamed. I write down my dreams. I feel it is your subconscious talking to you. Then I think of my schedule which is going to be so hectic."

"I like doing things myself, like going to the market or shopping. Some celebrities become famous and they forget who they are or where they came from and hide out like some recluse. I'm not going to do that."

Where does she see herself in 20 years?

"I'll probably be a mom with a couple of kids. I'd love to have a big family. Running my business and not traveling so much. I'll be in a lot of real estate businesses and hotels then. I'll be running my business from home."

Paris Hilton Reveals Business Plans, Aspirations for 20 Years From Now

Bow down, bitches! The heiress is actually brilliant. Her baby voice and dumb-blonde image is only a gimmick. It works flawlessly, but you can't be successful if you're mentally challenged, and this woman is one of the most ambitious celebrities around.

She's got fame and business all figured out. I am so impressed right now. What going on with me? First I cried over Jessica Simpson, now I'm into Paris for a moment? I may be losing my ability to be a gossip blogger. Hating is mandatory.

Paris says she works hard, plans out her dreams and knows where she's headed. That's more than many people without any money can say, let alone an heiress. Luvs it! :) Paris talked to Reuters about the misconception that she doesn't work.

"I am literally running a huge corporation. I have my clothing lines, my champagne, my watches, shoes and purses and dog clothes -- every sort of product you can imagine. I am doing movies. I am doing my record right now, producing, starring in a TV show. So it is a 24 hour, seven day-a-week job. I work all the time, so I laugh when I hear people say that."

To get through her day, she says the first thing she does in the morning is "think about what I dreamed. I write down my dreams. I feel it is your subconscious talking to you. Then I think of my schedule which is going to be so hectic."

"I like doing things myself, like going to the market or shopping. Some celebrities become famous and they forget who they are or where they came from and hide out like some recluse. I'm not going to do that."

Where does she see herself in 20 years?

"I'll probably be a mom with a couple of kids. I'd love to have a big family. Running my business and not traveling so much. I'll be in a lot of real estate businesses and hotels then. I'll be running my business from home."

Paris Hilton BFF Video

This shiz looks hilarious.

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