Brody Jenner Is Not Cool With The America's Hero Story

Brody Jenner says he's "horrified" by a profile written about him in the new issue of Details magazine.

In the article, Jenner and his best friend/manager, Spencer Pratt, are characterized as scheming to make Jenner famous – partly by dating or befriending famous people, including Nicole Richie, who Jenner briefly dated.

"Here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna start dating Nicole Richie. And you're gonna get that skinny bitch to eat, all right?," Pratt says, as part of the pair's alleged plan to seek fame. "You are about to become The Guy Who Got Nicole Richie to Eat. Process that s--t, bro. You'll be, like, a f---ng hero to America."

However, Jenner tells PEOPLE that the article unfairly makes him look uncaring about those he truly cares about.

"I have broad shoulders and can handle what is written about me personally but when I am misquoted or mischaracterized as exhibiting a disrespectful attitude towards someone I care about, I feel I need to clarify the situation," says Jenner.

"I genuinely love Nicole... I would never say or do anything hurtful to those I love and respect. I'm sorry it was represented that way."

In the article Jenner also says the "whole scene" in Hollywood is fake. "It's like a movie set, like my life is a movie set. These people, they all think this is real, but it's not."

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Brody Jenner Could Have Been A "F***ing Hero To America!"

Is Brody Jenner a tool?! We must find out. Let's investigate together, shall we?What was at the heart of the long-gone relationship between Nicole Richie and Brody Jenner? He was trying to get her to eat.

In the March issue of Details magazine, The Hills' star, Heidi Montag's piece (Spencer Pratt) gives some deets.

In a dialogue exchange, Spencer tells Brody to feed the skinny ass bitch aka Nicole Richie.

Spencer Pratt says to Jenner, "Here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna start dating Nicole Richie. And you're gonna get that skinny bitch to eat, all right?

You are about to become The Guy Who Got Nicole Richie to Eat. Process that sh--, bro. You'll be, like, a f---ing hero to America."

I love brilliant "bros." You wanna become an effing hero, have Nicole Richie eat some food! Gawd, that's genius!

A week after Jenner and Richie split in October, Jenner forged a relationship with The Hills costar Lauren Conrad. (That ended quickly, too.)

"Basically," says Jenner, 23, "I made it, like, my mission to try to go on a date with every girl on The Hills."

He's also extended his reach beyond the show. "Let's see where Lindsay's at, get her up in here," Jenner is quoted as saying as he text-messages Lohan, though the two are merely described as "just friends."

Even so, Lohan texted back and eventually shows up to meet Jenner at Hyde.And the future? "I wanna meet a girl who has nothing to do with L.A., a nice, normal, real girl."

Then he adds, "Actually, you now, that's gonna be a component of our new MTV show – me leaving L.A. to meet a normal girl. It might be hard, though, with all the cameras."

Brody and Spencer are both mimbos! And Nicole Richie didn't eat shit. So Brody, you failed. Now go date some other bony bitches like Kate Bosworth.

In the meantime, maybe you can come up with some other ways to become America's new hero. Process that shit, bro!


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Brody Jenner: "I Don't Text And Tell"

Rehab isn't getting rid of Lindsay Lohan's appetite for hot guys.

Lindsay Lohan, 20, who entered L.A.'s Wonderland rehab center on Jan. 18 to treat her addiction issues, has been sending bachelor-about-town Brody Jenner, 23, sexy text messages for the last couple weeks.

We've eye-balled one particularly flirtatious sext-message that Lohan sent Jenner - former flame of Kristin Cavallari, Nicole Richie and Lauren Conrad - last Saturday night in which the 12-stepper, among other requests, texted that all she wanted was "McDonald's and sex."

When asked by Usmagazine.com to comment on Lohan's textual pursuit, Jenner, who just signed a deal to be a spokesman for Scope mouthwash, said, "Sorry, dude. I don't text and tell."

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Kristin Cavallari Makes Brody Jenner Jealous

Kristin Cavallari is making her ex, Brody Jenner, jealous while on her Miami vacation. The Laguna Beach babe has been splashing around with super hot Nick Zano.

They stayed holed up in their suite (complete with a bathtub fit for two) all day and then went skinny-dipping in the pool.

Sources said Zano and Cavallari stopped by Nobu at the Shore Club for dinner, and were seated next to Jenner, who was dining with on-again couple Wilmer Valderrama and Mandy Moore. “Brody had that ‘caught in the headlights’ look.”

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Brody Jenner and Lauren Conrad Have Split

Less than a month after Brody Jenner told People that he and The Hills star Lauren "L.C." Conrad have split up.

"We're not together anymore," Jenner told a source on Thursday at the launch party for the new furniture collection at Minotti in Los Angeles.

The news was echoed by his mother, Linda Thompson, who told People at the Environmental Media Awards last week, "I think Brody's pretty single right now.

He's on his way to Miami. Bikinis, thongs. I think he'd better be single right now." - lol.

Conrad's rep had no comment. On Oct. 18, Jenner, 23, revealed that he and Conrad, who got her start on Laguna Beach, had started a romance.

In early October, Jenner split from Nicole Richie, whom he started seeing in August, just weeks after ending his year-and-a-half long relationship with Laguna Beach star Kristin Cavallari, Conrad's nemesis on the MTV reality show. Conrad split from her fellow Laguna Beach alum Jason Wahler in August.

I seriously can not keep up. If you're gonna cheat in Miami, break it off, player. I can't be mad at that. Kristin's laughing so hard right now she's choking.


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Brody Jenner Opens Up About Lauren Conrad

People finally reports:

Brody Jenner and The Hills star Lauren "L.C." Conrad are "seeing each other," Jenner tells People.

Brody said, "I don't know what you consider dating, but we're seeing each other, we're having a great time with it.

She's an amazing girl. That's all there is to say. She's fun to be around. She's sweet. She's kind. There's nothing bad to say about her."

In other words, Lauren fucks well, real well, and she gives oral even better.

Break Brody off something for more than a minute for me bitch. I'd actually like to meet this slut. Fucking your enemy's ex? Bitch deserves a crown.

Surprise, Surprise: Bones Can't Handle Sex For More Than A Minute

Bitch is into quickies:

Just days before Nicole Richie's split with Brody Jenner a lady shrieked when she opened the restroom door at swanky Beverly Hills eatery, Kate Mantilini and discovered the emaciated “Simple Life” star and “Princes of Malibu” hunk Brody – who were definitely NOT rehearsing for a new reality TV show together – wrapped tighter than snakes and lip-locked closerthanthis!

Red-faced, the lady closed the door, then clocked a good five minutes before the heavy-breathers exited.

When the pent-up lady finally got in and concluded business, she found evidence of Nicole and “Prince” Brody’s hot struggle – his wallet on the floor – but gritted her teeth and dropped it on their table as she exited.

Back in the spring, Nicole was forced to deny that she had a bathroom quickie with Jason Mewes of “Jay and Silent Bob” fame after his pal, director Kevin Smith, let the news slip during a speech at a school. He said that Nicole “made a man” of Mewes in less than a minute in a bathroom stall.

Homophobe Busta Rhymes also claims to have given it to Nicole “real quick.”

Brody Jenner's goods were put to waste. When you got Brody, you better last for more than a minute. At like 84 pounds, I'm surprised Bones can go at it at all. Nothing makes ya smile like a story bout an emaciated whore burning calories in bathroom stalls. Go Bones. Go. Now eat something bitch.

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DAILY LINKAGE

CNN gives details on NFL stadium bomb threat
Jeffrey wins Project Runway
Anna Nicole's son will be buried today
Nicky Hilton poses with nude models (NOT safe for work)
Catharine Zeta Jones is mad at her hubby
Johnny Depp reunites with Burton for musical
Megan Mulally does project runway
Matthew McConaughey, "Lance Armstrong and I are not lovers."
Sofia Coppola is pregnant with a daughter

Brody Jenner: It's Time For Backstabbing

Brody Jenner hooks up with Lauren Conrad.

Brody Jenner is making the rounds with none other than his ex-girlfriend Kristin Cavallari's nemesis Lauren Conrad.

Brody and Conrad were caught Wednesday night at Mel's Diner in Los Angeles cuddling up. They were first caught Oct. 2nd at Shag in LA.Reports have been swirling around that Brody and Kristin are both hanging on to hopes of reuniting. If that's the case, then this next twist in the true-life soap opera is almost a guarantee that reunion won't occur.

Lauren is a huge upgrade from Bones Richie. Didn't know she was such a vindictive slut, (the best kind of slut). Kristin is so hated, it's almost like people go outta their way to eff with the pathetic, conceited bitch. Enjoy your man candy Lauren.

All you wannabe bitches, this is how you do it. Take notes.

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Is Brody Jenner Tired Of Nicole Richie's Bones?

Brody Jenner was spotted heading into Shag last night with none other than Lauren Conrad, the well-known arch-enemy of his ex-girlfriend Kristin Cavallari. Hanging out with your ex's enemy in public is still a pretty bold move. Also along for the evening was LC's "The Hills" co-star Heidi Montag.

It's been recently reported that Brody is dating Nicole Richie, however, throughout the course of the two aforementioned incidents, Richie was nowhere in sight.

Brody's not interested in D-Lister Lauren. He just hates Kristin Cavallari. Kristin's a conceited, talentless, balding whore hooked on hair extensions. Brody likes his bones, Nicole. Nicole has resources and she's a cheap date. He only pays for ice tea when they go out to eat.

tmz