Kevin Federline Offers His Sperm Out To His Chicago Audience

In front of a standing-room-only audience at Chicago's House of Blues Wednesday night, Kevin Federline (now also called FedEx) offered his goods, or shall I say bads? All I know is FedEx offered somethin' I don't want.

K-Fed reportedly leaned into the crowd to touch the hands of women who were reaching onstage. Around his fourth or fifth song, he made his only reference of the night to his breakup with Britney Spears.

"Hey, I see a lot of fine ladies in here. You know I'm a free man, right, ladies? You wanna dance with a pimp?"

Later on he added, "That's a sexy-ass lady right there," pointing into the crowd. "All my ladies, I love you to death!"

The sad thing is, Federsperm may have impregnated at least four groupies last night. Some whores are actually that dumb.

Which government agency should take action first? Homeland security? Center for disease control? Btw, please remember to spay and neuter your pets.

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